yours, tiramisu

the L train gives me (more) trust issues (nyc day 6)

Yesterday after a long night of eating and watching other people drink I walked to the 14th St / 8th Ave metro station to catch the L back home, only to learn that the train wasn't stopping there for some reason. The only option I had was to walk a few blocks east to the 14 St - Union Sq station, which would probably have been a more pleasant walk had it not been half past midnight. As I sat on the cold subway car, I thought to myself, is it too much to ask to expect a subway to run normally? Random unanticipated happenings like this can throw a wrench in plans or worse, strand people with nowhere to go late at night.

Unfortunately for me the minor inconveniences didn't stop there, because this morning my cupboard shelf collapsed without warning and caused a bottle of balsamic vinegar to shatter and dump acid and glass shards all over the kitchen. All the glass might not even be the worst part, because the stench of vinegar stubbornly refuses to go away. My eyes and nose water every time I step into the kitchen.

Today is the first day I don't have evening plans with friends, and surprisingly enough I'm looking forward to it. I've enjoyed seeing old friends every day, but I haven't gotten more than seven hours of sleep a night and I can feel my body pushing back. I'm burning both ends of the candle and it's starting to catch up to me. I hope to spend the evening doing laundry, catching up on work, and sleeping earlier.

Yesterday's dinner was a high school reunion of sorts, with some people I hadn't seen since graduation some six, seven years ago. I always knew we were a pretty diverse group of people, but even still I found myself surprised at how much the years have changed us, especially when it comes to how we spend our free time and how we think about work and money. I myself am content to spend nights here getting $10 dinner in Chinatown and window shopping in SoHo, but when I talk to people who go on thousand dollar shopping sprees and down $20 cocktails like they're nothing, I can feel my signposts moving, even as I stubbornly will them to stay where they are. New York in general seems to be making it less painful for me to part with my money. Try as I might, it's hard to resist the city's lifestyle inflation, especially when peer pressure and social norms come into play. I've been spending far more than I'd like to these past few days, and I'm wishfully hoping (praying, even) that this spending will slow down as I settle down and get more used to living here.

Tuesday, May 17th, 2023

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